I’ve come to know many beautiful and insightful activists in my work as a nonbinary public figure. Here are some friends that inspire and enlighten me. The best form of nonbinary and LGBTQ allyship is listening directly to us about our lives and experiences. Here are some of my favorite people!

People use Neopronouns and xeopronouns as our understanding of the spectrum of gender widens. Neopronouns signify the self-reliance of claiming new vocabulary to express profound truths of our identities. Xenopronouns, since they are unspeakable, convey a powerful and expansive view of the “practicalities” of having a gender identity.

Self-hate runs rampant in our day and age. The Buddha is often quoted as saying, “life is suffering.” I assume he was referring to self-hate. The journey to self-love is not easy, and it will take some stumbles and fumbles to find enough compassion to like yourself.

Your child knows who they are and what they want. They have been brave enough to initiate this journey and actualize one of their most profound, visceral truths. Your reaction as a parent should be simple: Respect their wishes. Offer them resources.

Pronouns and names are not “preferred,” they are an innate truth about someone that has finally surfaced. Practice with yourself to protect and uphold that truth in your LGBTQ+ loved ones. Say their names. Say their pronouns.

You can heal. A foundational step in healing childhood trauma is realizing there is nothing wrong with you. You may be imperfect, as we all are. But you are also capable of moving on.